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Friday Fun Stuff Tips for Going Gray

Back in 2015, I decided to do a post on going gray since so many had emailed me regarding this. This has been one of my most popular posts. Since I have so many new readers I thought I would update this post. At the time, I was reluctant to post about this as I realized it was not for everyone.  I didn’t want to be the torch bearer for gray hair.  For me it worked, I am happy I did it and I have never regretted it for one second. Once again I have had many questions about going gray and how I did it.  So here are my updated tips for going gray and what has worked for me in the years since I first penned this post. I love this image of all these beautiful women who have embraced their gray hair.

If you decide to go to the gray side, it has to be your decision.  It is helpful if your husband and your family are supportive (mine were). Don’t let your hairdresser tell you
that your hair will not be a “pretty gray”. If she does find a new one! I had multiple hair stylists tell me that.  When I went back to my original hairdresser she supported me. I was having to color my hair so often my hair began to look something like this.

rodneygentry.com

Why look like that when you could look like Emmy Lou, right?

.
emmy lou harris

Here are the three simple tips that worked for me when I decided to go gray.  If you have gone gray please share your trials and tribulations with us.

If you cut your hair shorter your natural gray hair will grow out a lot faster.  If you go lighter than your natural hair color it will lessen the mark between regrowth and the color that is being applied to your hair. Instead of doing a full base color add lowlights (instead of coloring all of the hair repigment your base color in strands) coloring all of the hair.

Once you have made it through the above process remember going gray is not your ticket to low maintenance hair.  Gray hair is dryer, coarser, more brittle, and frizzier than normal hair. Sun, minerals in your water and other environmental factors can cause your hair to yellow. I have a big problem with this particularly in summer even while wearing a hat.

how to keep your gray hair great

 

 


    

Here are my favorite products that work for me.  I am not endorsing these products for everyone.  There are many out there and you will need to find out which ones work best for you and your hair type.

My two favorite shampoos are Phytargent Whitening( #4 )(my personal favorite), on Amazon and Aveda Blue Malva Shampoo on Amazon. The Blue Malva is more economical so I rotate the two. My favorite conditioner is the Davines Alchemic Conditioner. To ward off the frizzies I use a combination of the original Moroccan Oil and the John Frieda Original Frizz Ease. I use the Fekkai Apple Cider Clarifying shampoo when needed for buildup. The one product I can’t say enough about is the Madison Reed crema Gloss.  It really cuts down on the brassiness when needed. I personally have my hairdresser do it because I am a big chicken and am not good with hair.

Once you have made the leap you need to be careful not to look like a grandma.  Make sure you have a current cut and you adjust your makeup.  I find that I need my lipstick and blush to have a little more color   Since I have gone silver, fuschia is one of my new best friends.  I could never wear white before. White is absolutely the best color for gray hair as well as aging skin! One of the best perks of going gray, you can dress a little more hip without looking like you are trying to be your daughter.

                                                                                      mydubio.com
 I hope these tips for going gray will help you as well. Please share any products or tips that have helped you.
I am going to be sending out an email to all of you who have so graciously supported my blog over the years.  I can’t tell you how grateful I am for your support.  I want to hear your honest feedback on what you would like to read more about and less as well. My fashion and beauty posts have always been the most popular but I don’t want this to turn into a fashion and beauty only blog.  Interior Design is my passion.  I fell into the beauty and fashion genre by accident.

 

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Aless says

    I had my final cut, that has allowed my shiny silvers to show through, just 3 days ago! I was so thrilled with the result that I almost kissed my hairdresser !(She’s pretty reserved, so I didn’t!)
    Over the last few years, I’ve become sick and tired of colouring my dark brown (natural colour) hair (for almost 40 years) and finally made the break. My hd told me she could just touch up small lengths of my regrowth each 5 weekly hair cut (I have a pixie cut), so the regrowth could keep coming while being ‘broken up’ by some dark brown. Then she didn’t do any colouring for the next 2 cuts and voila!! on the 3rd cut I could see beautiful silvery strands shining through. I still have small sections of dark (it could be grey or brown!) around my head but the lower back and sides are silver/dark grey speckles. I’ve discovered the joy of using sculpting gel as I muss the front and crown sections to allow my late-discovery little waves to do their thing!! The best part is that I have had my fringe trimmed up quite high, so I can wear it on my forehead or pushed right back. I think the latter has made my face look fresher and therefore younger!!!

  2. Humberto says

    Excellent post. I used to be checking continuously this weblog and I am impressed!
    Extremely helpful information specially the remaining section 🙂 I care for such
    info a lot. I was seeking this particular info
    for a very long time. Thanks and best of luck.

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      Hi Kim
      That would depend on what color your hair is. My hairstylist just blended in highlights and lowlights of my natural color, that way the gray growing out was not so obvious. Ask your stylist she will know!

  3. home before dark says

    I think your gray hair is snazzy and elegant. After my hair lost its vibrancy—I told my husband it was like my hair went from color to black and white—I had my shoulder length hair cut into a pixie and I have never looked back. Always fun to read about new hair products. Funny about what colors now look good with gray. Black, always and white which I have always worn. Without the reddish glow in my hair that color of green that looks so good on you makes me look like the aftermath of the Exorcist pea spitting moment. Not good!

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      Hi Pat
      I have been really afraid of that green as well. I have to make sure my gray does not have the least bit of brassiness (which is hard in the summer). I did not wear it for the longest time. I find mustard to be difficult now as well, which used to be a favorite. Black and White and gray always work!

  4. Jane says

    You have made it not only feasible and workable (as in your products), you cover so many bases. These are such a great variety of photos, with different shades and hair styles of women with their natural color. I’ve been gray for a good ten years, if you count looking at the roots that come through when getting my roots and highlight blonde done! I’m 58, and I knew I was going gray in my early forties. I wasn’t doing anything as far as denying the gray, any more that I wanted to be blonde over a dirty blonde…it simply was not appealing to me. I had been doing blonde since my early twenties…that desire hasn’t changed.

    Lastly, I embrace women in any and every form. We must back each other, hold each other close, and utmost, be respectful. This is the key to longevity and grace.

    Thanks aways for an insightful post. my friend!

    Jane x

  5. Lisa says

    What a timely post, I just started to grow out my hair and transition to grey a few months ago so I do have a long ways to go but thankfully I have had full support from family and my hair stylist. She had added blond to my dark brown to help blend the grow out and we will continue adding the lighter shade as needed. So thankful for the recommendations on products and coping with the process! Looking forward to embracing my natural look and having fun with a few make up and wardrobe changes-I’m 54 and ready for this new look.

    Cindy, do you think gold jewelry can be flattering with silver hair or is best to stick with silver?

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      Hi Lisa
      I am certainly no expert but I prefer silver. I think if you have gold pieces that you love you can make it work. It is all about mixing metals these days. Good Luck with going gray. It is freeing I have to tell you!

  6. Karen says

    Cindy,
    i Kon-Maried my hair. I’m in the middle of the process right now; both with my house and my life. It just seemed superfluous. I’m 2 haircuts away from full blown grey. I keep my naturally curly hair short, but I want to grow it out after it’s one color. I purchased Matrix so silver shampoo at Ulta during their annual sale. i always have an old-fashioned hot oil treatment at my monthly cut. It keeps the frizz away. Thank you for sharing your arsenal of products I bookmarked the post for future use.

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      Karen thanks for sharing what works for you as well. My hair has always been a bit unruly so it became more so as I went gray. I think I need to try your hot oil treatment. XO Cindy

  7. Debra @ 5th & state says

    You have me giving this strong consideration as you look smashing! But frizzy hair?!!?! I already have frizzy hair, does it actually get worse?
    Two of my besties are meeting each other in the England trip, both have such gorgeous white/gray hair, maybe I should join them!
    Thx for a great keeper of a post
    Debra

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      I already had frizzy hair to Debra. I have a feeling our hair is similar like so many other things! I think we were sisters in a former life!

  8. Marsha Scott says

    Ahhh, Vicki did a similar post earlier this week. I’m blonde, a natural blonde, who has had “help” for decades. Hi/Low Highlights on a base color. So time consuming. So costly. Anyway, I congratulate all of you who can do this. I cannot. My hair is very fair anyway, so changing to a “gray” from a blonde isn’t that big a step, but the gray I see is a gray I don’t like at all. Brilliant post, I do use some of your same products. Products are the key to me. My hair is baby fine, but it will do anything I ask it. And, goodness, what would I do with that extra 20-30 minutes I would save every single day !!!

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      I need to go read Vicki’s posts. For some reason they are no longer coming to my mailbox which means I miss many of them. I have a friend who was always a natural platinum blonde. She colored her hair for years and finally realized that her hair had turned a beautiful platinum on it’s own.

  9. Squeak says

    I started going grey in my thirties. I never coloured it. I’m now almost completely grey, except it looks platinum blonde. My hair isn’t coarse, it’s silky and soft. I get so many compliments on it. I don’t use any special products on it, just whichever shampoo/conditioner is on sale. It’s so easy to take care of and costs me next to nothing to maintain. Once a year I take all the money I would have spent on expensive shampoos, conditioners, treatments, defrizzers, etc., and buy something nice for my house.

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      Squeak you are one confident lucky girl. I bet your hair is gorgeous! What a great idea to buy something nice for your home with the money you have saved on products!

  10. Gail Storti says

    There’s nothing more beautiful than a woman with gorgeous gray hair, like you Cindy. If I had that kind of hair, I’d do it in a heartbeat!

    • Cindy Hattersley says

      Thanks for the sweet comment Gail. I wish my hair were a litle less unruly. We always want what we can’t have don’t we?

  11. Melanie Tippett says

    Love my silver hair, best ever decision to stop colouring after my husband encouraged me to stay natural. Never have looked back and like to keep it shoulder length.

  12. Anonymous says

    I have decided to go gray, it's difficult but my daughter is my biggest supporter! I hope I make it !!!

  13. Jean says

    I've been planning going gray naturally. For now mine is still mostly dark brown with a few grays in the middle. I think they are beautiful and add character. Well I don't know about cutting it shorter even when it's mostly or all gray. I need length for my natural waves to complete and to keep my hair out of my face. Thanks. When I get there I know to switch up the products I use a little. Already use moisturizing and frizz control since curly/wavy hair is drier by nature. Just have to add whitening products.

  14. Anonymous says

    Been "going" gray since I was in my twenties but hiding it is tiring when the "skunk stripe" comes in after coloring every 3 weeks. I decided to embrace my gray and I am loving it! I am still in transition, but at least I no longer have to worry about the stripe as it's now a thing of the past and my hair just keeps getting more silver as I go. I should have done it sooner, but as a very young looking 55 everyone told me I was too young to go gray – I'm glad I finally listened to my family and just did it!

  15. Jennifer Connolly says

    Terrific post!! I wish I was going silver as gracefully. I can't wait to get there, but will need a little salon assistance along the way. These products all sound great!! I'm bookmarking this page for future reference!! Thanks so much.

  16. Pat Huber says

    I want to say that you have never looked like that second photo! 🙂 I love your hair color now! Thanks for sharing what you have learned. It is not easy information to get–even from a hairdresser.

  17. Karen says

    Cindy,
    What a great post. I am a redhead and for some reason I lucked out so far and don't have to color my hair…that said, I'm pretty sure God offset that benefit with more than my fair share of wrinkles! 🙂 Mr. B. had a beautiful head of white hair and he's always looking for some good shampoos/conditioners for it. I'll forward this along to him.
    xo,
    Karen
    P.S. I didn't realize from looking at your picture that your hair was gray, I thought it was blonde…you look very youthful!

    • Cindy says

      Karen you are my new best friend!! There are plenty of wrinkles from abusing the sun over the years. Email me and I can give you a funny tip for Mr. B from my friend and neighbor!!

  18. La Contessa says

    YES!I had this epiphany about 3 years ago……to the HORROR of my hair stylist!My hair was lacking something I think I ruined it after a BRAZILIAN BLOW OUT!!She told me I was making a MISTAKE…….long story short she apologized to me and did the same thing!I LOVE seeing what I have EARNED!

  19. CiciBianca says

    My very dark hair began to turn grey in my 20's. It appeared in chunks and looked as if it were "Frosted". By my mid 40's I was almost totally silver and it became my signature look. Rarely does a week go by when I don't get at least one compliment or comment on my hair. I feel that paying attention to the cut is the most important aspect of going gray. Take the money you would be spending with your colorist and get the very best haircut possible.

  20. Holly Boyle says

    My daughter is a stylist in San Diego and highly recommends the Davines product. From Italy, everything in the line comes with the most fabulous scent. I am using their purple shampoo right now and cannot say enough good things about the Absolute Beautifying Potion with Royccu oil. Just a drop or two before styling and your hair is silken. One little bottle lasts forever.

  21. DREAMS ON 34th STREET ~ French bread & family says

    Great article, Cindy!
    I went natural for 6 years. Almost white except for the back "underneath"which is very brunette. I had my stylist add some low lights to match the back recently. I also am wearing it just above the chin for a natural face lift illusion.
    ~Lynne
    w/L

  22. Karena Albert says

    Cindy I have thought of this so often and adore your silver hair!! Brava!
    One day soon because I am so tired of coloring so often and the damage!

    Xoxo
    Karena
    The Arts by Karena
    Coco Chanel: Three Weeks

  23. Burlap Luxe says

    Thank you Cindy.
    I havé below bra strap length and so go short often, it grows so fast…. I colour my roots with simmi colour not to harm my hair, I can still hot iron it without damage to it much, I have very wavy hair and harsh colour treatments I fear, if I cut it shoulder length and let it grow out I know I would hate to see that 1-2-3-4 inch grow out…. I had been thinking of having a colorist just go for it with that young trendy blonde that looks silver grey, then grow out would be a little easier.

    As for beautiful greys, I have a friend with the most beautiful grey shoulder length grey healthy looking hair, and she just uses a bar of soap for full body fave and hair from the health food store and she glows, low matinence hair that she puts in a pony tail at the back of her nap of neck and cuts the bottom off, it's such a fabulous look I envy that natural look.

    My daughter does not want me to go grey, she is to use to her French Mom and her dark hair…. But soon I will join that j.Jill super grey trendy look!

    You wear your look beautifully, and dress the part.

    Thanks for the tips.

    Xoxo
    Dore

  24. Cindy says

    Thank you so much for your comment Celkalee. Many of my old friends thought I had bleached my hair blonde at first they didn't believe it could be that color. That is so funny that you had the same experience!!

  25. celkalee says

    You are playing my song! I am at the color every 3 to 4 weeks right now, very dark brown hair. I have done the low lights a couple times but eventually go back to the original color, I am a wimp. My hairdresser will need to get 10 new customers to cover college tuition for her kids if I stop. Several years ago I went from dark brown to light blonde, just to see. No one knew me. I even returned to my prior workplace, walked through, said some hello's etc, they did not know it was me! It was fun in a way and I may just do that again…or not. Thanks for the information on products. It is always good to know what is available.

  26. Nancy Powell says

    Im in the over 60 bracket and have to color my hair every 3-4 weeks! It's getting ridiculous, but Im not quite there yet to go gray. I love the look though and it can look so stylish and chic. Have a great weekend! xo Nancy

    • Cindy says

      You look great just as you are Nancy! I know what you are saying though…as long as you can keep your hair healthy no need to worry!!

  27. pam {simple details} says

    I think you always look stunning with your gorgeous hair and hip style, Cindy! I'm not there yet with the gray, but have a teenager about to drive so I'm sure it's only a matter of time! 🙂 Looking forward to your posts.

    • Cindy says

      Pam you are way to young to do it, but thank you so much for the compliments I can use them now that I am about to get a hip replacement!!

  28. therelishedroost says

    The Blog "That's Not My Age" Had an image of a woman yesterday who had great dark gray hair I loved it! I just starting to go gray and my hair just keeps getting lighter to cover it. I will have to surrender one day and follow your advice here!

    • Cindy says

      Karolyn your hair will probably not look any different when you go gray. A friend of mine has platinum blonde hair. She was always insulted when people thought it was gray…she quit coloring it and it was the same color!

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